Love at First Sight
Yes, men think so...or is
it 'lust' at first sight? How can a woman or man
'really' know?
If a woman thinks it is 'love at first sight',
she may have found an incredibly 'hot' guy who
matches her ideal social persona 'catch'. If this
guy actually knows how to be a natural, all women
will want him and she will have to fight with
others to 'keep him' (I can teach you to be this
man).
Otherwise most of them appear to be quite boring
because they try to impress her and don't 'get
it'. But when dealing with 'love at first sight',
yes it might be, but then longer term dynamics
start to sink in and kind of spoil it.
Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder, I mean,
beholder.
'Love at first sight' is usually only perceptionally
based if not in its entirety. No one can match
up ideally to one person's expectation of who
they are or who they should be. Once you find
out more about them, you're going to be disappointed
in what you thought they were. See how selfish
we as people really are?!
Eventually you go through the hardships of a 'real'
relationship and very very rarely will everything
work out perfectly where the people are a real
match (at least in our highly developed, opinionated,
individualistic cultural society).
You are only throwing your perception or ideals
on who you think that person is or should be (I
have done this a lot in the past). We want a person
to be the ideal match to what WE think they should
be. Most often if not all the time, we find out
they are not actually what we idealized and then
are a little disappointed. A real relationship
is going to take a lot of work and a lot more
work than two 'simpler' people.
If you can spark attraction shortly after you
meet a woman, there is a more realistic chance
she will feel deeper emotions for you than her
social persona (of what states what she says she
wants) and she will often forgive your other misgivings
as long as you understand natural attraction.
This is actually very generous of her because
now, guys (way) below her level physically actually
have a chance. The process of attraction is slightly
different for men and women.
Men will often instantly disqualify women for
a sexual relationship based on their looks (ahem),
while women keep an open mind to see who knows
how to make them 'feel' the feelings that they
respond to so powerfully physiologically and emotionally.
They are interested in a mans character attributes
because that are things that can be of interest
for the long haul.
These feelings have a biological root which she
cannot choose or control. This is why an average
looking guy who 'get's it' can have more of a
chance than a good looking guy who easily proves
himself wrong to her right away.
She will resent that most of her counterparts
do not 'get it' yet but will be open to starting
something with a man who finally can just 'lead
her through' the natural process of attraction...then
often sex 'just happened' or she got 'swept away'..this
is the way it is supposed to be and that she fantasizes
about (and reads in those sappy romance novels).
Don't be thrown off by what a woman says she wants
if you are not that social reflection of her consciousness
yourself, she is programmed biologically to react
to men who are true naturals with her or who display
aspects of being a natural. Do not let that stop
you. Her biological inheritance (when in tandem
with a true natural man) will override ANY social
programming she may have, as long as he maintains
true congruency and doesn't 'screw it up'.
If you are a natural you probably won't screw
it up when you are reaching that part of her (there
is much more leniency here). If you are 'walking
on egg shells' by trying to be 'qualified' by
her social persona, it's virtually a guarantee
you'll screw it up even with any small move. Take
the very ending of 'Boat Trip' where Roselyn Sanchez
says to the wussy Cuba Gooding, Jr. character,
"Ok, but you BETTER not screw it up."
Sure the movie ends with a kiss but who has the
control here? Whose reality is he in? Love at
first sight, but he is based in the wrong paradigm
of 'being' that he WILL screw it up because of
the power dynamics and several other factors (she
is in control by far).
In fact, you will almost put aside the entire
notion of 'love at first sight' because it's too
romancey for you (although you may secretly keep
that dream alive); but you understand reality
a little more, that different relationships with
different women are going to give you different
experiences.
Of course you may be aware of lust at first sight
with women you see most everywhere you go, but
you really have to get to know her more to find
out who she is, otherwise it is all just perception.
If you can develop yourself to look as good as
you can and get your internal paradigm and life
straight and clear, then you can naturally accelerate
the process of attracting women and starting things
with little effort. Your focus should really be
on developing yourself and living in a natural
paradigm, while denying all of the perceptual
B.S. that is going on. Be an interesting and intriguing
man and improve yourself; HAVE something to offer
women who are lucky enough.
Your 'love at first sight' from their point of
view only happens if you match their social ideal
(and traditional ideal of Prince Charming) and
then know how to take everything from there...then
all women will want you. You do not have to be
Prince Charming..that is another article, but
remember how you relate to her says everything.
She needs to be turned up like a volume knob and
you have to interact with her to spark the process
of sexual attraction and her interest will grow
in you...through time, may lead to infatuation,
love, great respect, devotion, passion, etc. from
her.
It is all in how you relate to her so don't pay
too much attention to having to have Brad Pitt
looks, with Soros' bank account...that's the same
as you wanting to date a supermodel, except you
probably have a better chance than she does to
meet your ideal because there are so few men left
who really get it and are a great catch in their
own right (with some nice social status to boot).
There are countless beautiful women. The advantage
and favor is in YOUR hands. There are few men
left who are awesome catches AND who know how
to deal with these women. Make women want you
just by being your true self at all times; an
interesting, funny, great guy and know how to
take it from there (I can help you there as well).
About the author:
Rion Williams offers a free newsletter subscription
on how to have 'natural success with women' and
dating.
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